100 Posts, 100 Reasons for Madness

Greetings, all! You are currently reading the 100th blog post in my long and tenured tradition of sporadic updates. To commemorate this occasion, I have much to share with you: Transcripts and memories from my recent trip to the San Diego Comic-Con, wild stories from the mosh pits at Chicago's Lollapalooza, and of course more comedy jokes about my thrilling and devastatingly empty-pocketed journey to Los Angeles. These are all forthcoming, either residing in rough draft in my brain or notebook, and I shall be sharing them with you in between the madness of packing up my life for a cross-country expedition. But until then, I'd like to call your attention to this monstrosity.

Has Meet Dave taught us nothing? Why must this man go forth and transform human intelligence into silly putty? Alas, there is no answer. But look forward to "Eddie Murphy/Romeo & Juliet Project" coming soon to a theater near you (for two weeks).

At San Diego Comic-Con I had the distinct honor of witnessing the 20th Anniversary Reunion of Mystery Science Theater 3000, hosted by Patton Oswald. The entire cast was there, including Mike-era Crow T. Robot, Bill Corbett. Imagine my shock to learn that Corbett was 50% of the cinematic dream team that belched Meet Dave's screenplay into existence. To be fair, even he seemed embarrassed by the outcome. "...I'm currently writing screenplays that, UNFORTUNATELY, do get made into movies," quoth the Corbett while sadly averting his eyes. It seems that years of watching bad movies paves a career of...well, creating bad movies I suppose! Even if you're a certified gold-medal riffer, you realize that La-La Land can change a half-decent idea into a hulking steaming terd. Be careful out there, aspiring writers! It's not a safe place for the insecure! Have confidence in your ideas, but I'd say, more confidence in revision. After all, practice makes perfect, and who knows your stuff better than you?

It's hard as hell to get a movie made, but it's even harder to get a movie made worth making. I wouldn't put all my eggs in one basket, but you can't leave your eggs half-boiled either. Every project deserves some polish, and it's important to know that when you're finished, you've done everything you can to make it work. It's not enough to have tired hands and a weary brain. You have to know your work is done.

That's not to shame Bill Corbett in any way. He's an incredible performer and a clever comedian. Sometimes projects just get cruddy, and sometimes writers need to survive. It can't always be art, but the least it can be is entertainment. As a creator, it's your job to make it so, number one. Even if the outcome is, well, number two.